Hey, meet your volleyball team...they're terrible.Janitor


Elliot at her new hospital.

Things have changed recently for J.D., he is currently living in a hotel after the ceiling of his apartment collapsed, Turk and Carla are trying to make a baby and Elliot is working at a new hospital. Turk then starts sneaking J.D. into his apartment without Carla knowing. Dr. Cox is getting frustrated with J.D. now that they are both attendings, particularly when J.D. wears exactly the same clothes as him. The new interns then arrive at the hospital, and J.D. thinks about what it must be like for them, and we then see through Keith's eyes as he tries to find the courage to talk. Dr. Cox then gives J.D. five man cards, which will be taken away from him everytime he does something feminine, just a few seconds after this happens, one of them is taken away from him. Meanwhile, Carla tries to convince Elliot to make friends at her new hospital, but Elliot is more concerned with not getting any help from anyone in the hospital - by running back to Sacred Heart to grab supplies as she doesn't want to ask anyone where the supplies are in her hospital. When she is caught by Dr. Kelso, she is forced to pretend she still works at Sacred Heart.

Carla seducing Turk

As Turk and Carla are trying to make a baby, Turk decides he doesn't want a baby and starts secretly giving Carla birth-control pills, but Carla then finds one in a brownie that Turk made for her. J.D. also catches someone out, as he finds out Dr. Cox has been telling J.D.'s interns how to treat a patient, a way that J.D. does not think is right. J.D. tries to confront him about this, but Dr. Cox just walks away - and the same thing happens when Turk tries to confront Carla. Elliot then reveals to Dr. Kelso that she doesn't work at the hospital anymore and that she has been stealing hospital supplies and Carla finds out that J.D. has been sneaking back into the apartment. Carla gets annoyed with her three friends for not being able to move on, Turk for not wanting a baby, J.D. for not being able to start living on his own, and Elliot for not being able to make friends at her new hospital. Carla then manages to convince Turk that having a baby isn't so bad, after telling him it's like having a dog that learns to talk. Dr. Cox tells J.D. that there's a slight possibility that J.D. will have a new year. By the end of the episode, Carla and Turk prepare to make a baby, Elliot sits down for lunch with her new co-workers, and Keith finally manages to find the courage to speak to J.D.

Dr. Cox lists the one rule of being an attending.

Plot Points

  • J.D. has to deal with his own interns as Dr. Cox tests whether he's still willing to bend the rules despite more responsibility.
  • Turk hesitates at the thought of Carla getting pregnant.
  • Elliot starts her fellowship at "North County University Medical Center" and tries not to appear foolish.

Recurring Themes

Sacred Heart Horse Hospital


  • Sacred Heart is now a hospital which treats patients like horses, with all the staff carrying round shotguns and putting anyone down who is ill.

Turk drops a birth control pill into Carla's mouth


  • Turk drops a birth control pill into Carla's mouth while she is sleeping.

Janitor story

As J.D. has new interns, he gives Janitor the challenge to bother him without being around him, so Janitor makes life sized cardboard cutouts of J.D. and leaves them around the hospital. At one point J.D. uses these to try and hide from Dr. Cox.

J.D.'s Girls Name

  • Angie
Angie, my buddy down in the lab just told me that your urinalysis came back positive for the birth control pill. So! I will be taking one of... these. Thank you!Dr. Cox

  • Lindsay
Lindsay, by you reaching the level of Attending Physician, you've somehow managed to become a member of a club that I belong to.Dr. Cox

Episode Running Gags

J.D. driving a Porsche

  • Keith carries around a to do list, which has only one thing on it: "Find courage to talk."
  • J.D. eats homemade brownies that Turk made and laced with birth control pills for Carla. J.D. has one of his man-cards taken away because the birth control pill was found in his urine test. Later he still eats more of the brownies even though he now knows that they are drugged.
  • J.D. takes another man's Porsche, driving scarf, driving gloves, and driving sock, which he has stuffed down his pants. J.D. later has another sock stuffed in his boxers.
  • J.D. can do an impression of Turk's voice.
  • J.D. has to sneak out of the apartment in his underwear in order to do laundry.  At the end of the episode, he is sneaking back into the apartment in his underwear to "make a quick twosie."
  • J.D. gets tackled by Johnny the tackling Alzheimer's patient (seen through Keith's perspective).

Guest Stars

Tom Schmid as Fellowship Director


     List of music featured in Scrubs

  • "Anything Can Happen" by The Finn Brothers
  • "Are You Gonna Be My Girl" by Jet
  • "Devil Baby" by Mark Knopfler


J.D. matching Cox's outfit

J.D. in Turk's gym bag

Janitor's snake face

"Who am I!!!"

Turk getting excited by his sandwich

J.D. musses Keith's hair

Man cards

Sacred Heart Horse Hospital for Humans

J.D. shoots a patient

Keith's to-do list

Now that I'm an Attending, I'm a licensed Badass.J.D.'s narration

Get out while you still can. Seriously, get out while you still can.Ted to Keith

I hate this place.Dr. Kelso

It hates you, Bob.Dr. Cox

I'm a little sick of the Turks.Elliot

Excuse me?Turkish Omar
Heh, not you, Omar. I love your people. I'm talking about their lovey-dovey crap.

Did you take my Porsche from the valet?Porsche Owner

This didn't feel like my scooter.J.D.

I'm gonna go ahead and give you back one of these Man Cards. You deserve it.Dr. Cox

Wow. ...Wanna hug?J.D.
You held on to it as long as you could, didn't you?!

You know what I've been doing? I mean, besides listening to my Alanis Morissette CD to get pumped up to talk to you?J.D.

[Hands over a man card to Dr. Cox]


Now, I really don't like being Den mother to you three!Carla

[Elliot, J.D. and Turk look at her in disbelief]
Fine, it's like crack to me.

Dude, you're still eating those [birth control] brownies!Turk

I don't wanna get pregnant, shootJ.D.

Dr. Dorian, I've kept my mouth shut about all the recent sexual harassment complaints because I don't think it's fair to punish a man for making small talk.Dr. Kelso

Dr. Cox says it's like having a dog that gradually learns to talk.Carla


Lindsey, by reaching the level of Attending Physician you've somehow managed to become a member of a club I belong to, obviously there was no vote because if there had been you would still hear the sound of my voice screaming "Nay Nay oh dear God one thousand times Nay", that being said it is my obligation to let you in on the organization's one rule, we are men- Dr. Cox


  • It is shown in this episode, that J.D. speaks Turkish, or just enough to keep Ömer from stealing his pudding. he says "o benim muhallebim ömer" in turkish. But the headdress Ömer is wearing is actually Sikh.
  • Syndicated airings of this episode usually cut out the J.D.'s "o benim muhallebim Ömer" quote. Also Carla's rant about being the den mother is shorter.
  • The "horse hospital" scene is a reference to the comic strip "The Far Side". The patient shot is named Mr. Larson after the author of the cartoon, Gary Larson.
  • The "Ooga Booga" Dr. Kelso does while trying to scare Keith is similar to the one he does in My Balancing Act.
  • Elliot makes Kelso believe that she still works at Sacred Heart. However, her lab coat obviously has the logo of her new hospital on it.
  • The few physical characteristics of Keith that are revealed in this episode (his height and hair color and style) don't fit with what he actually looks like when he appears in later episodes.
  • When J.D. is hiding among the cutouts, the Janitor mouths to Dr. Cox "Number Five" but the real J.D. is actually sixth in the cutouts from left to right.
  • Although he doesn't make a physical appearance until the next episode this is the first appearance of Keith it is not until later in the season that his last name is revealed as Dudemeister.
  • Possibly inspired by the M*A*S*H episode "Point of View" which is from the eyes of an injured solider.

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